It’s hard to express myself and even harder when the person you are talking to has no idea what you are talking about. In my generation it is pretty obvious that there are so many slang terms and the older generation is not up to date with this lingo. This is no different than when I speak to my grandmother in Spanish.
When I speak to my grandma, I always have to remember to change my “ghetto” lingo into appropriate Spanish. My grandmother was born in the 1930s so when I say something to her without changing the words she usually looks at me with confusion and goes on to tell me that my generation has gone to –pardon the word- shit. I think she says this because it is different in the Hispanic culture where there is a lot more respect seen by the youth given to their elders than there is in the United States. So when I speak to her in anything other than a formal way she gets uncomfortable. For as much as I tell her that things are different in the United States, she just prefers that I always speak to her in a formal way.
When we do speak, we try to speak of not just how my schooling is going but how the world is deteriorating due to the carelessness of people. Yet I find this somewhat out of place because of my grandmother’s background; she stopped going to school at 13 years old and began helping her parents provide for her 8 younger siblings. She had to learn how to grow up faster than anyone and accept the fact she would not get a proper education. I feel that because of this, my grandma grew up with strict traditional values that would have originally lost their importance over generations. When I speak to her, I try to accommodate to her standards only because I know what she has gone through to get where she is now.
I look up to her and if I were to decide to speak to her in my slang terminology I sort of feel like I am disrespecting her. I have noticed that whenever I am around her I tend to use more intelligent words rather than made up words from the street. Whenever I end my visit with her I notice that I almost always leave with a greater sense of meaning than when I first arrive. I do not try to be some ghetto speaking girl but at the same time I am a firm believer that friends are one of the biggest influences in my life; therefore, I usually tend to start absorbing the lingo that my friends use. I try not to get influenced but I mean let’s face it- I still have teenage tendencies and psychologically speaking I will most definitely get influenced my peers.
The fact is however that despite getting influenced by my peers, I am able to communicate with my grandmother the way she expects without there having to be any room for confusion. I still forget to speak to my grandmother the way she expects whenever I visit her, but it’s not long until she straightens out the bad communication and turning it onto an intelligent conversation.
Friday, October 1, 2010
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I have been in the same situation as you many times. It’s amazing what even an age gap can do to something that you think of as universal, such as language. Even in our own separate languages, both evolve and change over the course of years. Nothing portrays this more then when you try to talk to someone who is much older than you are.
ReplyDeleteMy grandfather was born in Oklahoma, and as such he grew up with a completely southern belief in his daily life. The woman stays home and cooks, he worked. He would accept nothing else. One thing you would absolutely, positively, NEVER hear him say is “god damnit!” How often do you hear this exclamation come out of people’s mouths whenever they are angry or frustrated? I swear if I ever said something like that, even now as a full grown adult, I better have had some good reflexes or eyes in the back of my head, because I believe that a hand would be coming towards my head faster then I could blink.
Our language keeps evolving at a rate that I am sure I will not even understand a few of the things my own children are saying in a few years. I know that the day will come where I am considered “old fashioned” in my choice of words, but when I think of how things were when I think of my grandparents, my choice of words would seem radical to them.
I compare the evolution of language with the evolution of television. In the 50’s and 60’s, when you saw a married couple on television, they slept in different beds, if not in different rooms. Nowadays, it is quite acceptable to see a couple on television share a bed in a sitcom, or network TV show. It seems as the times keep rolling down the track, those things we consider “Radical” become more and more commonplace. My choice of words seem radical to my grandparents, and I am certainly prepared to deal with the radical language from my grandchildren!
Hey there, Cyn!
ReplyDeleteI'm so jealous of you because you are bilingual! I wish I could speak another language fluently and that I had someone in my family to speak it to.
It's definitely interesting trying to censor yourself around your elders. I imagine all new generations have their own specific lingo, a lingo which causes their elders to shake their heads, waggle their fingers, and say, "You crazy kids..." Ha. I know that when I go visit my grandparents, I have to try not to say "hella" (I blame my San Franciscan friends for infecting me with this disgusting word), and also my favorite phrase to use in moments of distress, female dogs and women of questionable morals (bitches and hos in grandparent-ese).
Sometimes, you just have to think before you speak. Isn't that just horrible?
It's pretty sad that the youth of today, myself included, are so disrespectful of their elders. I have to wonder if this disrespect has always been a problem or if this is a result of society today and how we interact with one another. Still, it is frightening to imagine the future. I hope things go back to the way they were, respect wise, in society when I'm older.